Companionship

The hypocrisy is amusing. We do need company and yet we want our space, as in deep down our utterly selfish nature is thinking only about itself, obsessed with self impression and has little space to accommodate someone else. There are very few, like this Guy thoughJ)

We could translate the above in to saying that Pj’s life sucks sometimes when she feels alone, but the moment she steps outside it stinks even worse. She comes back to her den again, all alone.
Staying alone is better than going for false company which one finds in abundance, for everyone needs company but deep down you can't trust. Going by the law of averages we can not rule out the distrustful factors in our persoanl 'dealings', we kill ourselves, conceptual problem of bringing business when you just need to be happy.

Sometimes you could be out of place in a whole culture, it may just happen …then looking for company is like finding a needle in a haystack. Acknowledging the cultural difference helps in dealing with it. We all can be happy if we could trust goodness, if we could actually be good. Goodness multiplies, it comes back to you in bounties.

Last night it very clearly occurred to me that ‘people make it happen’. Look at organizations, the church, the legal system, the political system, educational institutions, research projects…people are getting together. No one man is moving a mountain, not always. It should involve people if it is a material context. If you gonna get married don’t do it secretly, involve people, have a bash, throw a party…people are important.

And this is not some PR agency speaking. Genuinely, connecting with others, loving your family, looking after college mates, hostel mates is important, not as a duty but just a natural part of sharing breathing space with one another, sharing life’s precious moments for they happen to be around at the same juncture of space time as you are. (But, categorically, ‘Do not take shit’, from anyone). For once I know that I genuinely respect bonding and will go for it, if it is apt.
And if I need to drop selfish projections of my own self I will do it, true companionship does not come from owning people or hoarding them, but greeting one who meets your eye, making space for one who has to pass by, leaning on someone if you feel weak and extending a hand if someone is in need.
And then there are those precious precious moments when you can just be with someone (walking may be) without a reason! I mean when you can just be with people and not see a deliberate purpose in it. Be yourself in it. Such situations occur only in a place where there is no war going on, society is liberal, progressing, tolerant, where people pursue their material goals and still find time to sit with each other.

But the same material concept of companionship does not hold true in a very specific sphere, time for introspection. Crucial that one may understand this. It is true that every man dies alone…crucial that this aspect be understood, delineated and made clear so that one may not overlap inconsistent arenas. Material companionship is functionality, important. Companionship of any kind has a functional relevance and a functional limitation. Personal growth, like the pain one experiences, is a microcosmic experience, like death, birth and enlightenment. These happen in a personal space.




The concept of personal space should not be exaggerated, you can’t use it as a reason to ignore others, nor can you let false projections affect it. These false projections may be a shroud of lies which you may have used in defining your relationships with others. If you are framing lies then there is something wrong. Personal space is that healthy time you spend with yourself where you introspect without getting conscious of other people’s opinion of you and then go back to be with people with a satisfied, earthy smile on your face.

For mediators too there is a Sangha, a whole gamut of people on a personal journey. Nobody is trying to uproots the other, everyone is growing in their own soil reaching for the sky.